Irrefutable Proof
by PuppyBeBad
Summary: Dib finds proof that Zim is far from human but will he be able to hold on to that proof or will he lose far more then a picture. Warning: Yaoi


**Irrefutable Proof**

_Just a quick doodle I did a few years ago under a different name figured I should post it here to, Dib finds proof that Zim is far from human but will he be able to hold on to that proof or will he loose far more then a picture. By the way, I know some of the words are misspelled, or I used the wrong word, or the word is just missing. I did that on purpose to add to the Invader Zim type of humor…yup that's the reason… DO NOT QUESTION ZIM! _

Dib screamed rushing to the door. He had finally gotten irrefutable proof that Zim was in fact an alien. Not even his incompetent classmates could deny the avoidance. Dib clutched his camera tightly as he heard the mechanical legs of Zim's pack. "I have irrefutable proof Zim!" Dib yelled "No human being would laugh at a movie starring Rob Schneider!"

"You foolish fool!" Zim screamed, "I was not laughing. I was… I WAS CHOKING ON MY TEARS FROM THE HORROR!"

"Nice try Zim, but no one will believe you now!" Dib laughed as he reached for the handle. Zim leaped forward pinning the human to the floor, a mechanical leg slicing right through the camera "Noooooo!"

"Yes human, now bow down to the genus that is ZIM!" Zim laughed pretending that's what he meant to do

"Why do you allows talk in the third person," Dib scuffed, "you'd think a 'superior' alien race would at least know how to talk,"

"Silence! You have come far too close, Dib" Zim sneered, "You have defied ZIM! er hum me… yeah me… for the last time!" a slight smile touched the alien's lips, "and I know just the way to make sure you will never interfere with my plans again, mawhahahahahahahahah ahahahahaha… ha…"

###

"It's nearly midnight and your brother still hasn't come back yet" Professor Membrane suddenly cared, "my poor insane son, who knows what trouble he's gotten himself into with his ramblings!"

"He's probably at Zim's house" Gaz scuffed, her closed eyes made it easier for her to play the game, "He was wearing he's stupid ninja outfit"

"It's far too late for him to be playing ninja with Zim," Professor Membrane insisted, "Gaz, I need you to go out into the dark spooky night alone and ask any random adult to give you a ride. I must return to my lab. I am working on a device that will instantly remove all body hair (side-effects may include itching, swelling, and lose of skin). As you can see I have far too much to do to call Zim's parents and have them bring Dib home"

"Whatever" Gaz groaned "I'm on the last level,"

###

"Stupid Dib…" Gaz mumbled hearing screaming coming from Zim's house but ignoring it. She reached for the door knob that would open the door to Zim's house thus letting her in Zim's house where she would be able to drag Dib back home. She slowly reached for the knob

"Awww!" Dib screamed from inside the house that was the house of ZIM! She slowly put her hand on the knob "SOMEBODY SAVE ME!" She slowly turned the knob "AWWWWWWW!" She slowly cracked the door open, "I hate suspense," she growled bashing the door open

"Gaz, thank god, save me! WAIT! Where are you going!? COME BACK!"

"I am officially scarred for life" She mumbled walking back home

"Silence human," Zim roared, "No one can help you now, soon you will belong to ZIM! Then nothing can stop me!" Zim smiled pleasantly, "Praise the genius that is ZIM!"

"Your pure evil! Even worse than I thought previously you were,"

"You will not have that definitive tone for long Dib," Zim cheered,

"get off of me!"

"The ritual is nearly complete Dib, soon you will belong to ZIM!" Zim laughed, "Mawhahahaha,"

"How the hell is raping me going to help you," Dib cried trying desperately to get away

"Silence! Do not question ZIM!" Zim thrusted himself further inside of Dib

"AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWW…. that hurt,"

"sorry…" Zim mumbled slowing his hips, "better?"

"a little… wait get off of me!"

"NEVER! You will soon belong to ZIM!"

"how many times are you going to say that?"

"Fine, you will soon be the properly of ZIM!"

"I never belong to you!"

"Be the property of ZIM! I rephrased it remember?"

"Shut up!"

"uhhhhhhhhhhhhh,"

"Gross what you just put in me!"

"The ritual is complete!" Zim screamed than slowly pulled himself up, "You now belong to ZIM! Obey me!"

"Jerk," Dib mumbled pulling his pants up

"Silence,"

"I'm going home," Dib mumbled walking out the door

"Wait! Come back! You cannot deify ZIM!"

"Bye-bye," Gir screamed as Dib walked awkwardly down the side walk

###

**The next day at school **

"Lies!" Zim screamed pointing at Dib

"Yeah, Dib that's low even for you," a random ugly child glared over at Dib from her desk

"But I'm telling you," Dib cried, "Zim likes Rob Schneider movies!"

"Slander!" Zim screamed "No one likes Rob Schneider,"

"yeah he's movies are stupid," another kid yelled

"You have to believe me" Dib cried

"Silence big headed human," Zim snarled

"Shut up Zim," Dib screamed, "I'll expose you for the revolting alien you are!"

"Why is the mating ritual not taking affect?" Zim thought out load, "I must consult the Almighty Tallest! Gir!" The microphone come out of his pack, "come pick me up Gir"

"Yes Sir!" Gir saluted then stopped transmitting

"Did anyone else see the microphone!" Dib roared

"I bought it on ebay," Zim spoke loudly but calmly

"See Dib, he got it on ebay," a kid snapped

"how could he get that on ebay!?" Dib screamed, there seemed to be alot of that going on.

"You can find anything on ebay" Zim reminded

"Yeah" all the students screamed just as Gir smashed throw the wall. Zim quickly jumped on Gir's back, "now Gir, fly before anyone notices!" Gir's rockets quickly launched them away Dib quickly turned to his classmates but frowned staring at them

"I wish my dog could fly," one of the kids signed and the others quickly agreed with him.

###

**Back in Zim's lap **

"I do not understand Almighty Tallest!" Zim screamed, "Why is he not submitting to Zim's will,"

"It is curious" Red agreed, Zim finally had interesting information for them

"Maybe he doesn't want to submit!" Purple sneered rather defensively, "ever think of that!?"

"Maybe he should feel honored to be chosen by one with a superior intellect," Red glared

"Maybe he would if somebody would take the trash to the incinerator every few decades,"

"Maybe that somebody feels he doesn't need to waist his valuable time on something so trivial,"

"Of course somebody would think it's trivial, he doesn't bother to clean up after himself! He just assumes his mate has nothing better to do than clean up after him"

"Well maybe if his mate put out a little more often than…"

"hum Tallest?" Zim puzzled

"Shut up!" Red snapped, "this has nothing to do with you!"

"oh yes just go yell at Zim, that will solve all their problems," Purple sneered

"His mate used to love it when he yelled at Zim!"

"well maybe his mate would feel more appreciated if somebody would bother showing his appreciation every now and then,"

"That's it!" Zim yelled, "I will insure Dib's obedience by doing NICE things for him, thank you Almighty Tallest. Zim over and out,"

"You see" Purple snapped, "even Zim gets it!"

###

"Hello Dib's scary sister," Zim smiled standing at the door, "I have brought Dib the revolting flowers and chocolates as your inferior human mating rituals command. Now present Dib to the appreciating ZIM!"

Gaz quickly pulled Zim inside in slammed him against the wall. The forced caused his wig and contact-lenses to fall off

"Whatago Gaz!" Dib cheered jumping off the couch, "now just hold him still well I get my camera,"

"Shut up Dib!" Gaz snapped glaring down at Dib who nervously sat back down. Once Dib was seated Gaz turned her attention back to Zim, "I will allow you to be with me brother,"

"What?" Dib's cry was ignored

"but if you ever hurt him I will insure your every waking moment be filled with horrors that you couldn't begin to fathom,"

"doesn't raping me count as hurting?"

"Shut up Dib!" Gaz and Zim snapped

"Dib is my mate," Zim snarled, "It is my duty to protect and care for him, you will not dare insult me with your pathetically human threats THAT ARE PATHETIC!"

Without another word Gaz let go of Zim and walked out of the room Zim brushed himself off then marched over to Dib, presenting the chocolates and flowers. Dib looked way and stuck his nose high up in the air

"Take the damn chocolates Dib!" Gaz roared from the other room

Dib groaned but took the flowers and chocolates. Zim sat next to Dib, "Do you not feel APPRECIATED by Zim?" Dib just glared at him,

"what you do to these?" he asked examining the gifts

"Must you be so paranoid?" Zim signed, "anyway I rented a movie,"

"I am not watching anything with Rob Schneider," Dib spat

"You must bow down and worship Rob Schneider," Zim sneered, "beg for his forgiveness!"


End file.
